From anxiety to happy tears

From Anxiety to Tears

Sometimes when someone comes in for photos, it’s really hard for them. Some people have never liked pictures of themselves. They walk in with a big sigh and say something like, “I don’t know what you’re going to do with me.” Sometimes it’s been years since they’ve had photos taken, and they aren’t used to seeing themselves as they are now – at this age, at this stage of life, at this weight, after everything they’ve been through. Sometimes they’ve lost someone important and are slowly finding their way back into the world. Sometimes they’re starting something new – a business, a creative dream, a fresh chapter – and taking a leap of faith by investing in themselves.  And sometimes they simply don’t feel like their best self when they walk through the door.

It can be exciting to book a photo session, but it can also feel incredibly vulnerable. I understand that feeling deeply. There are days when I would rather hide from the camera myself and that’s why I make a point to have my own photograph taken now and then – to remind myself how awkward and exposed it can feel to be on the other side of the lens. When someone walks into my studio feeling nervous, I recognize that feeling right away.

Recently, a client arrived who was having a particularly challenging day. I could see it the moment she walked in so instead of rushing anything, we slowed down together, looked through clothing options and I gently suggested a few pieces I thought would photograph beautifully. She sat for hair and makeup and had the chance to simply relax for a while – to breathe, to chat, to get comfortable with the idea that we were about to do this together. Little by little, the tension lifted and I could see her beginning to trust the process.

I like to joke that the photo part is “quick and painless,” and that usually gets a laugh but the truth is, I’m not here to push anyone into pretending to be something they’re not: no stiff poses, no forced smiles. My goal is simply to let me show you in your best light and it’s always a lot easier than people imagine.

Once the shoot began, it flowed easily. The hardest part was already behind her. Then came my favorite moment – when we sat down together and looked at the images. She started to cry a little bit! Through her tears she said something I will never forget:

“I usually see everything I don’t like about myself when I see photos of me. But right now I’m feeling the exact opposite. I actually like how I look.” That moment right there is exactly why I do what I do: helping someone feel good about themselves – especially someone who thought it wasn’t possible – is one of the best feelings in the whole world.

Photography isn’t about the surface appearance and the pictures for me (although the end result is important)! Seeing yourself with a little more compassion and acceptance is a great feeling. If you’ve been afraid to come in for photos, please know this: You don’t have to feel confident before you arrive, you don’t have to know how to pose, you don’t have to feel “ready.” Just come as you are. I’ve got you.